Tips For A Successful Non-Monogamous Relationship

Hi, I'm Karyn, your couples therapist and relationship coach with A Better Relationship Coaching. And this week, I want to talk about a topic that honestly doesn't come up very often, but it certainly does come up. I've seen it be a little bit more relevant this year than I have in the past, so I thought I would mention it this week.

What I want to talk about today are tips for a successful non-monogamous relationship. While non-monogamy is not the most common relationship dynamic, there are actually a lot of couples that really embrace this in their relationship or are starting to think about if this could be a good fit for them. And of course, I'm referring to consensual non-monogamy. Right. So this is not talking about infidelity or anything like that. This is, you know, two people that have decided to open their relationship in one way or another.

But even though this is consensual, there can still be challenges that can come up, like jealousy and time management. There can actually be a lot of social stigma for non-monogamous relationships and also the emotional complexity of these situations. So let's jump right in.

The first thing that I recommend is to really make sure that you're prioritizing your primary relationship. While other relationships are good and necessary, and if you're deciding to open up your relationship, that's obviously going to be a part of your life. But it's so important to make sure that both of you keep that primary relationship primary and regularly spend time together to maintain that connection. This is going to help you deal with some time management issues that come up, also if you already know that you are prioritizing this relationship.

The second thing that I want to mention is the importance of building a good support network. Not everyone is going to be understanding or supportive of non-monogamous relationships, which makes it really important to make sure that you do have people in your support network who understand and are not judgmental so that you can have a safe space that is actually supportive. This can really go a long way to help deal with some of that social stigma that can come up as people learn that you have this dynamic in your relationship.

The last thing that I want to mention, which can help with issues of jealousy and helping with conflict resolution in your relationship, is the importance of open communication. And I know, I know, I talk about this all the time, but this really is the very best way to make sure that everything is clear and that you and your partner are on the same page. It is natural that feelings of jealousy will arise at some point, and the best way to handle this is to be honest about it and address it as it comes up. It's important that you have ways to support and reassure each other in these situations, which will actually end up helping to strengthen your relationship in the long run.

And of course, having communication about the kind of rules that you have set up in terms of opening your relationship, what that looks like, what both of you are comfortable with, and how that's going to work is very important to have a mutual understanding of what that's going to look like ahead of time so that there's no confusion later on.

Lastly, when couples start opening up their relationship to other people, along with good communication, it's important to have regular check-ins and flexibility so that both of you can feel comfortable honestly expressing yourselves, your thoughts, and your feelings about how things are going and if any changes need to be made.

Alright, that's it for this week. I hope that was helpful. Don't forget to hit follow and head to my website to get your free workbook, "Seven Questions to Reconnect with Your Partner." This is helpful for all kinds of relationships, so go ahead and download that now and let me know what you think. Until next time, take care of yourself and take care of each other. Thanks.