How To Make The Choice To Have A Better Relationship

So last time I talked about how having a better relationship is really about making the decision to do that. And today, what I want to talk about is how do we make the decision to have a better relationship. And it's actually pretty, uh, simple and not very easy all at the same time.

So the way you actually make that decision to have a better relationship is to stop and look around and say, hey, am I happy with how things are? Is this okay for me? Am I satisfied? And if you're not, then you make that decision in that moment to say, I'm going to do something different. I don't want to keep living like this, I deserve more. My partner deserves more. We deserve more together.  That's easy to say, and it is harder to do because there's a lot of vulnerability with putting yourself out there to say, hey, I'm going to really learn how to do something different takes quite a leap of faith, but once you do that, then you can move into all of those actions, right?

Once you decide, hey, I don't want to do this anymore, right? We've been doing the same thing over and over again, obviously not working. We both want to do something different. Or maybe you're the only one that's there yet. That's okay too. Um. Then dig in. Listen to podcasts like this one. You know, learn about relationships. Learn about healthy relationships. Um, learn how to make, you know, changes in yourself that have a positive impact on your relationship with your partner. But that really is the first step in having a better relationship, is just looking around and saying, I'm not doing this anymore.

If you're able to make a lot of changes on your own, there's, like I said, podcasts, books, blogs, videos. There's all the things, right? That's awesome. If not, get help. A relationship coach, a couples therapist. There's plenty of people out there that are able to help you and to speak to. If your partner isn't interested, maybe they're not there yet. Um, you can move forward on that on your own. It's definitely possible to decide for yourself: I don't want to do this. Maybe my partner is okay with it, but I need to do something different for myself. You don't need permission from anyone to make that decision for you if you know it's the right one to make. And there are plenty of coaches and therapists that will see just one individual, even if they're wanting help with a relationship. So I encourage you to be proactive with that. 

Then once you're in it and decided then there's going to be all the other things that you learn, that's when you learn, you know, all the skills that you're going to need to have that better relationship moving forward. And you'll get into all of those things, you know, how do I turn right and set a left right. How do I make that decision at the moment, you know, what do I need to do for me? What do I need to do for my partner? There's all of those other decisions that are things you're going to learn later, and those are also extremely important. But the first one is just looking around and saying, no, I'm not going to do this anymore.

So that's why I say it's simple, because it is. And it's not easy because it can be really hard, but it's definitely worth it. You have a long life. You don't need to be living it in. 1.1s A relationship that you don't feel happy or comfortable, or that your needs are being met and or that you don't feel heard. So I just encourage you to really look around and and assess what's going on in your relationship and decide if you're happy with it, and if not, make that decision to do something different. 

All right, so that's it. Short and sweet. I hope this was helpful for you. And I will be back next week. Until then, take care of yourself and take care of each other. Thanks.